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Health & Fitness

Blog: Adapting to Life and Work in a New Country

At 32 years of age, Frenchwoman Muriel Demarcus discovered that life outside of France was possible and even enjoyable when her family relocated to London for to her husband's new job.

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This week we are featuring "My Gutsy Story" by Muriel Demarcus.

By background, I am an Engineer. I used to be able drive trains and my specialty was Signalling (you know, the stuff that always fails on the railways). I have walked down the tracks while new trains were being tested (scary) and opened new metro lines in Paris. I have also investigated train accidents and tried to re-calculate speed profiles using complicated modeling tools to understand what had gone wrong.

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I am French-born, and it is fair to say that until recently I was a pure French product: I had been to the right schools and universities, and was pretty much brought up to climb the corporate ladder. Oh, and I could barely speak English -let alone write it, because German was my first foreign language (don’t ask, it is a French thing).

But in 2004, I had to go out of my comfort zone: to cut a long story short, my husband was offered a job in London. Basically, I had two options: change husband, or change job. I chose the latter, which meant that I had to drop my much-loved job (an important part of my identity!) and find something else, in London this time. My industry works a lot by word of mouth and I eventually managed to find something else, less interesting of course, but somehow I felt that I couldn’t be too picky, given that my English was so basic…Soon enough, I felt that I was wasting my time and my talents. I felt trapped.

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As a woman with a French accent, I wasn’t being taken seriously at all. I have lost count of the “Do I know you from somewhere?” comments. My notes were constantly edited to make them “Oxbridge-compliant” (I am used to working in bullet points, but it wasn’t doing the trick over here!).

So, after a while, I decided to start my own business in parallel. It was about the development and management of commercial properties, mainly to maintain and store boats—I just saw an opportunity and grabbed it when I bought some cheap land close to the coast. Eventually, my business started to make more money than my day job.

It was time to change my priorities. My boring but comfortable job was holding me back. I didn’t like it any more. Still, finding the strength to resign was more difficult than I thought: most people wait patiently for a nice redundancy package, but that was not my mindset, and I knew that the extra time spent on my business would bring me new clients anyway. After months of procrastination, I finally resigned and left. Most of my colleagues didn't understand why I didn't wait to get some more money.

What I love about my business is that it gives me the time and flexibility to take care of my family and explore other side of my personality, such as writing. I started my blog (www.FrenchYummyMummy.com) as a New Year’s resolution. It became addictive. After a few weeks I had more than 4,000 hits a month. I couldn’t believe that my thoughts and worries could be of any interest. I was clearly wrong. It felt good.

I am now writing as much as I can, with a view—who knows?—to publish a book one day. It is all about explaining how it feels to be French amongst the British. But more importantly, I feel more like myself. I am finally designing my life around what matters to me. I know it is better late than never. But, after years of always doing what was expected from me, I am slowly starting to become what I want to be. Oh, and I am learning to drive boats now!

Muriel Demarcus Bio:

Muriel Demarcus is a self-proclaimed French Yummy Mummy living in London. She started working in Paris in the Railways industry and never imagined that she would have to move abroad. At 32 years, she discovered that life outside of France was possible and even enjoyable when all the family had to move to London due to her husband's new job. It was 7 years ago and since then she doesn't feel French any more and isn't British yet. Her two daughters have now started to correct her bad English accent, which she hates. In 2011, she decided to start a blog and hasn't looked back since. She can be found at www.FrenchYummyMummy.com or @FrenchYumMummy on Twitter.

Sonia Marsh Says: What a great story about getting out of your comfort zone and adapting to a new life in the U.K. Not only that, but you started your own company, taught yourself English, and started your successful blog French Yummy Mummy. I love reading books about Americans, Australians and British women who moved to France. Now we can look forward to a book about a French woman living in the U.K. Who knows, you might move to the U.S. next. It would be interesting to read your perspective on life in the U.S.

Sonia Marsh Bio

Sonia Marsh is a blogger, mom, world traveler and unconventional thinker with a passion for tropical islands. She is the founder of the "My Gutsy Story" series, and author of the forthcoming travel memoir, "Freeways to Flip-Flops: A Family’s Year of Gutsy Living on a Tropical Island.”

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